Here are some of the best Dwight Schrute quotes from The Office:
- “I come from a long line of fighters. My maternal grandfather was the toughest guy I ever knew. World War II veteran. Killed twenty men then spent the rest of the war in an Allied prison camp. My father battled blood pressure and obesity all his life. Different kind of fight.”
- “I am faster than 80% of all snakes.”
- “I’m not superstitious, but I am a little stitious.”
- “I’m not saying I’m Superman, but let me just put it this way. If I were shot in the head, I’m pretty sure everything would be fine. I’d almost definitely be able to continue my job as regional manager for Dunder Mifflin.”
- “Bears, beets, Battlestar Galactica.”
- “I have been Michael’s number two guy for about five years. And we make a great team. We’re like one of those classic famous teams. He’s like Mozart and I’m like…Mozart’s friend. No. I’m like Butch Cassidy and Michael is like…Mozart. You try and hurt Mozart? You’re gonna get a bullet in your head, courtesy of Butch Cassidy.”
- “I’m sorry, what was the question? I was distracted by the sound of my own awesomeness.”
- “I don’t hate it. I just don’t like it at all and it’s terrible.”
- “It’s a real shame because studies have shown that more information gets passed through water cooler gossip than through official memos. Which puts me at a disadvantage because I bring my own water to work.”
I hope you find these quotes amusing! Let me know if you want more.
